This is a very insightful article written by Christine Comaford, a contributor to Forbes magazine.
Jon was a control freak. He was also the CEO at a mid-sized manufacturing company. His seasoned executive team resented not being trusted to own their areas of the business. They were polishing their resumes when I was called in.
Jon thought he was a great boss. His team thought he was a micro manager. Who was right?
Neither. Because each of us has a different Map.
The Map Isn’t the Territory
None of us directly operates within the world as it is. We create internal representations, or Maps, of the world based on our perceptions and experience of it. Our Map helps us organize our interactions with our world, it dictates our behavior. At the core of our Map are our beliefs and identity.
You cannot change people. You can, however, change their Map by altering their subjective experience of their world. This change comes about by adding new helpful resources to a person’s Map via neuroscience techniques, which I’ll teach you over the next few blogs.
The result of changing someone’s Map is the end–or at least dramatic reduction–of challenging behaviors, limiting beliefs, and emotional disengagement. The business result is increased accountability, proactivity, commitment, performance.
Here’s the Net-Net:
- Everyone has a Map
- Each Map is unique
- You can learn to edit/enhance your or another’s Map to improve abilities, performance, power, choice
- You can learn to step onto the Map of another to influence outcomes and/or increase trust and connection
You’re likely wondering:
- How was my Map created?
- How do I edit/enhance it?
- How do I step onto another person’s Map to better work with them?
When you learn to edit your and another’s Maps the possibilities for growth and increased results are endless.
Your Ecology was formed between the ages of 0-3 years old. Your Ecology is your frame of reference, what you learned from your parents about the world, how much safety and belonging you experience, how much you feel you matter in the world, how you see the world, what you believe about the world and yourself.
Your Ecology formed your initial Map; it is the collection of internal resources you have at your disposal. Your Map can be edited or enhanced. It’s just that very, very, very few people know how. It’s deep and totally ingrained in your subconscious mind. Maybe you have patience, trust and confidence on your Map, maybe you don’t and would like to. Maybe you want access to different resources.
Your Desires are simply what you want to create in your life. Now here’s the tricky part: you are stuck in the middle of a massive tug of war pulling you in opposite directions… a tug of war of your subconscious mind. Equal and opposing forces are pulling you back to your Ecology and pulling you forward to your Desires. No wonder it can be hard to get what you want, or once you have it to feel satisfied. As we edit and enhance your Map the pull of your Ecology lessens. Then you can more easily fulfill your Desires.
Back to Jon and his trust issues…
Jon was raised in a home where trust was minimal, and in his marriage he had finally taken the leap and granted trust to his wife. Everything was terrific. He was a trusting boss, had a happy and high performing team, and then one day his wife said she had fallen in love with another man and was leaving. That day Jon stopped trusting people–for good. Fast forward 5 years and we see Jon’s controlling and micro managing at his new role has become out of control.
Over 6 months we used a number of neuroscience tools to access Jon’s subconscious mind and heal his trust of others and himself. Then we taught him reinforcing behavior patterns. Now his executive team is deeply engaged, Jon has more time to spend on strategy and key alliances, and he has married a wonderful woman—whom he is having a solid experience of trust with. Jon edited his Map, adding trust of self and others to it.
How do you enhance your Map and the Map of others? You do an Outcome Frame followed by the appropriate neuroscience process to access your subconscious mind. The Outcome Frame you can do on your own, the neuroscience process your (properly trained) executive coach can do for you.
Here’s a basic Outcome Frame.
- What would you like?
- What will having that do for you?
- How will you know when you have it (specifically)?
- So there you are in the future and you have what you want. What risk might you take to ensure this change is going to happen?
- What will likely happen if you don’t solve this the way you want? What will be the impact on your business and life?
- What might someone have to believe about the world/company/situation to get this?
- What might someone have to believe about themselves?
- What can you appreciate about (the current situation prior to change)?